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Are you a co-dependent Cinderella who loves a man who hates women too much? A Peter Pan in denial about his inability to make a commitment? If so, it's time to stop analyzing your relationship.
Even if you've discovered from the talk shows and the self-help books that you're afraid of intimacy or prone to self-destruction because of a miserable childhood, has it really helped? If not, it's time for action; it's time for Love Is a Verb.
Here is a fresh, new approach to relationships. The book goes beyond analyzing relationships to changing them, even if one partner isn't interested. Using a solution-oriented approach, humor, stories, and good common sense, Bill O'Hanlon and Pat Hudson (marriage counselors and husband and wife) show readers how to:
- break free of old patterns in days and weeks, not months or years
- quickly and easily solve relationship problems
- improve their sex life
- increase feelings of love and closeness
- get over past hurts
Lively, upbeat, and future-focused, Love Is a Verb shows readers how to change today's dreams of more romance and happiness into tomorrow's reality.
- Sales Rank: #545761 in Books
- Published on: 1995-02-17
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.60" h x .80" w x 5.80" l, .91 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 185 pages
From Publishers Weekly
Many of today's self-help books, according to this husband-and-wife psychotherapy team, try so hard to get readers to find out what's wrong with their relationships that they don't get around to showing them how to improve them. This theme is apparent in the first chapter's humorous title: "The Codependent Cinderella Who Loves A Man Who Hates Women Too Much." By changing unworkable patterns, rewriting their "stories" (false beliefs) and focusing on the future rather than endless analysis of the past, declare Hanlon and Hudson, couples can make love more rewarding-in weeks or even days. Later chapters focus on destructive patterns like abusive behavior, gambling, etc.; "healing rituals" for unfinished business and reconnection; and intimacy and sex. Boxed key points concisely sum up each chapter, and examples from the authors' practice and own marriage lend credibility to this helpful self-help book.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
The authors, nationwide lecturers on making relationships work, will kick off their solution-oriented text on Today.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Booklist
O'Hanlon and Hudson (happily married marriage counselors) put the emphasis on action, not analysis, in their advice on improving any "romantic/sexual relationship, heterosexual or homosexual." They assert that "having a good explanation, by itself, doesn't change anything." This solution-oriented therapy is neatly explained, using many anecdotes from the therapists' own experience, both professional and personal. The advice moves from areas of minor disagreements to marriage- or life-threatening ones and includes suggestions for responding to a spouse's violent or criminal behavior. A final chapter on intimacy and sex deals with issues of impotence, anger, and boredom. Denise Perry Donavin
Most helpful customer reviews
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
no self help book would ever get a five from me
By Rebecca G Casey
so a four is as high as i go. fives are reserved for literature. my husband and i read this book when we were a new couple (seven years ago). he and i both had alcholic fathers and so we are very familiar with the self help genre. and although it does seem simplistic in some ways, i found it to be a most valuable book. if your relationship is at the point where you are afraid to sleep at night for fear of having your throat cut, this is not the book for you. (in fact there are no books for you run to a therapist) this book helps you become aware of the small things we do and can do for each other to hurt or help intimate relationships. its kind of like a "doc my arm hurts when i do that. so don't do that" book but it focuses on things that you will not see (unless you are more observant than i). if is helpful on a day to day level and my husband and i still pull it out and reread chapters when we find ourselves being testy with each other. i recommend this book to all people.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
fun and practical
By A Customer
It is a sounding, simple book, but the suggestions are practical. it seems to be "old-fashioned", but in this complicated world, when we all are over-emphasizing internal psychological problems, "behavior-ist" is ignored.
This book reminds us to pick "them" up again and take a look at these simple but yet working principles of human behavior and relationship.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
A Self-Help That's Really Helpful!
By A Customer
Unfortunately, many self help books and tapes are one
person's viewpoint on how to solve a problem and have not
been shown to work for a broad spectrum of individuals. This
tape is not one of them. O'Hanlon & Hudson have taken a
very effective method of changing behavior and adapted it to
helping couples. The tape is entertaining and extremely
helpful. It not only explains the why's of couple problems,
but also gives great suggestions on how to solve any problems.
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